To Be Resolute

After lots of thought over the past couple months, I've finally come up with what I feel is a good theme for my life goals. It's the result of a lot of personal assessment, trial and error, and wishful thinking. :)  I believe there are two kinds of aspirations. First, there are Bucket List Items, such as: "Climb Mount Everest," "kiss in the rain," "run a marathon," and "try sushi." These are fun and add variety and spice to life. The other kind of aspirations are Character Goals. As I've seriously considered New Year's Resolutions over the past decade, I've decided that the focus should be on the Character Goals. These are "to BE" items, the way you want people to talk about you after you're gone. You know, the things you want to leave behind, and the influence you have with others.

First, I looked back over the past few years of my life to find the times when I was LEAST happy.  I found them in the moments of unneeded rest. Too much netflix, too much facebook, too much laying about. In that realization, I understood that one word I want to be described as when I'm old is

Energetic

The other unhappy moments fell under clenched teeth, tight shoulders, too little rest and too many migraines. So while it may seem an odd juxtaposition, the other word I've chosen is

Peaceful

I continued the exercise by choosing other words that could easily be categorized under these two over-arching life themes and be used to help me achieve them in smaller steps. I came up with ten.

Energy:

Active

Creative

Educated

Economical 

Organized and Efficient

Romantic

Peace:

Focused

Faithful

Prepared

Charitable

Obviously there can be some overlap, but that is what makes it a cohesive goal! My hope is to set one or two small goals each year in each subcategory so that I ultimately become both Energy and Peace. 

Here's my list this year.

Active: 

* Participate in some form of exercise every day 

* Go outside every good-weather day

* Do something fun outside the house at least once a week, either as a family or with friends

Creative: 

* Do one creative activity/craft with Evan every week (something unusual- not routine)

* Make something beautiful each month

Educated: 

* Read something besides the scriptures every day 

* Write something every day 

Economical: 

* Completely out of Credit Card Debt

* Stick to grocery budget

Organized and Efficient: 

* Make a To Do list each Week and each Day

* Minimize clutter (toss!)

* Leave the house clean before bed each night

Romantic: 

* Do something fun with Hubs at least 3x each week

* Get dressed, do hair and makeup at least 5x each week (simultaneously :) )

Focused: 

* Continue to study my Patriarchal blessing in conjunction with the scriptures

* Review goals once a week, keeping them with the Patriarchal blessing

Faithful: 

* Quarterly Temple attendance as a couple, more often if opportunity presents itself

* Focus on sincere prayer, especially making morning prayer a priority

Prepared: 

* Complete and create rotation schedule for 72 hour kits

* Three-months food storage

* One-month emergency fund

Charitable: 

* Pray daily for Charity

* Go visiting teaching every month, pray daily for assigned sisters

* Reach out to one person I love each week through a phone call or handwritten note

It may seem like a long list, but most of them are small daily things that I feel I can fit in even in the face of upheaval, such as our upcoming move, raising a toddler, and being snowed in (<today>). :) I know that reviewing them weekly as part of my scripture study will help me maintain my focus. I'll keep you updated by recording my monthly project and weekly toddler crafts, spiritual thoughts from my personal study, and notes on our finance journey. 

Happy New Year!

Recent Read ~For the Married Ladies' Eyes Only~

So, I've been really debating whether I want to put this book up here, but I do think it is an important and too often ignored issue, so I want to share my newfound confidence with all the women I love out there.

I feel a little weird recommending it because there are sections that I know would make some of you uncomfortable. However, MOST of the sections were truly revolutionary to me and have totally changed my thoughts on the subject. She discusses how to align our sexuality with our spirituality and understand that those aren't two completely separate parts of us. 

All of her advice is within the context of marriage between a man and a woman,

and she is Christian, though she is not LDS. SHe is a counselor and speaks to all sorts of groups about the subject of sexuality and spirituality.  It's all about improving your marriage relationship (not just sex) in ways that make both of you happy and confident. She is very respectful and I felt increased dignity and respect for myself and my husband during and after reading it. 

So, with a grain of salt and a spoonful of sugar, I would recommend reading this one if you feel like your relationship with your husband could use a boost that will also help you feel amazing about yourself as a woman and daughter of God. Feel free to skip the section about spicing things up behind closed doors if you don't want that kind of advice :) As she says, she doesn't PRESCRIBE (or recommend) any of it, she just DESCRIBES it so you can find what works for you as a couple. I am doing the same thing. I am recommending the sections on changing the way we as women think about ourselves, deal with our pasts, and handle our sexuality, not the sections that contain... other things I don't want to mention here. Please also be warned that in most printings of the book those chapters contain simple illustrations. Luckily, mine did not. However, I don't consider it pornographic in the context. You'll have to leave that up to your own discretion. Obviously, it's about what you're comfortable with. If you still want to read the book but aren't comfortable with that kind of advice, try blacking the illustrations out, or even remove those chapters entirely and throw them away. Whatever you have to do, read the other chapters! It will change your love life. Personally, I read the whole book and was able to simply filter out what I was and wasn't comfortable taking away (which is exactly what she advises). 

You can also visit Shannon's website at www.sexuallyconfidentwife.com, and you can email me if you want more info.

Here's to happy marriages! 

Repurposed Dresser!

We found this dresser when we moved in, right next to the dumpster. It was ugly but our apartment was so lacking in storage that we grabbed it and wiped it down. At first we used it for some dishes while we figured out how to arrange the kitchen, just sticking the dishes in the drawers. The drawers were hard to open and awkward in our dining room. Not to mention, one of the top drawers was missing.  Here it is in the background, I didn't take very good before pictures.

So, I decided this dresser needed a new function. I took out the drawers, removed the hardware, and stacked the drawers up on top of the base to serve as extra shelves. The paint (white, yellow and teal) are my previous attempts to make it look better. I didn't like it once I started, so rather than waste time and paint, it sat like this for about 4 months. Sad, I know.

I was having a really hard time committing to a color, but I would just sit on my couch and stare at the ugly wood and beige paint and just vacillate between colors. Blue? Teal? Green? Yellow? I was feeling noncommittal. I knew it would be a lot of work and some money! I have neither one to waste.

I finally had a Home Depot store credit from a return so I decided I would commit to a color scheme for the whole living room. It's red, teal, white, and gray, with a few splashes of yellow. So I decided to go with red for the shelves. I LOVE it. It took me about three days. I made some home-made chalk paint by adding 1/3 cup plaster of paris and 1/3 cup water to 1 cup of my flat, interior, "Firecracker" Behr Premium paint. It's a very smooth, chalky finish and I prefer it to gloss. Here's an "after" shot, before I replaced the books and toys.

I hope to get some big baskets that fit into the toy shelves to hide the toys, or maybe put a curtain across the front. For now this will do! I love them and the red really adds some warmth to my house, and it feels more like a living room and less like a warehouse. :)